Posts Tagged ‘Christianity’


cindy radioActually we were both on the radio yesterday.  Well sort of.  We recorded two hours of discussion on marriage and divorce.  Cindy and I are both christian and on our second marriage.  In a lot of church circles this is not just a taboo subject to speak of but also a taboo thing to do.

Getting married a second time is just something that is not talked about in the church. Well during this radio show we discuss our personal stories of marriage and divorce.  We also touch on the subject of abuse in the church, which is our main focus in our ministry.

We sure had a lot of fun! Two hours was over in a flash.

I will post links as they are made available. In the meantime if you want to hear other recordings of Cindy discussing abuse, visit our website at  Hurtbylove.com

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My wife wrote an article titled “The World Still Needs Kings” you can find it here. http://wp.me/p1OaB7-3i

In my opinion it was one of her greatest posts, yet she barely received any comments from anyone. Which is odd because it was very inspirational and perfect for the times. As the title suggests, the content deals with men being real men. Not some sissified version of what we have today. I also am firmly convinced that the church is gravely afraid of men stepping into this role. They always talk about wanting men to step up to the plate. But what they mean by that is “church attendance” and that’s it! Going to all night prayer meetings and men breakfasts. The church draws the lines on masculinity because they want to play it safe. Real men aren’t safe. Real men can be dangerous. There is collateral damage in battles between good and evil. There hasn’t been a battle in the church in a long, long time. There hasn’t been a battle because men aren’t engaging in battle anymore. They have lost the desire and ability to fight.

God forbid if a man were to speak the truth in a group of feminist church-going people! Why that would be very offensive and insensitive. We have to be all inclusive in the name of tolerance too. No wonder men hate going to church. Funny, how every time I go on this rant I am labeled as a chauvinistic neanderthal.

Furthermore, I am told that because the younger generation uses every form of social networking on the computer that I must do so as well in order to connect with them. I hate texting, it’s bondage! So is technology. Guys have their heads down so much looking into that stupid little phone that they are not aware of their surroundings. I see it all the time in church too, it drives me crazy. I have mentioned my irritation with it and I’m told to be accepting. What a load of BS!

Being aware of my surroundings is vital if I am going to be able to protect someone from an attacker. That is one of the reasons men are physically bigger and stronger. That’s why we have a rage inside of us when we see an injustice. Unless that too has been buried by political correctness and tolerance. Man I hate that word “tolerance.” Men have buried their instincts so much that it has been replaced with fear.

Most women who read this are going to disagree with me too because for a woman to accept this concept she must give up control, she must be completely trusting and be willing to follow her man. Again it may appear to be dangerous to do this, but in a true kings arms is the safest place to be.  Now do not confuse a legalistic family dictator with a true king or playing golf with the pastor doesn’t make you a true king either.  The problem is that there are too few kings around because the church has burnt them all at the stake. The church has followed the world and emasculated the male in the name of tolerance, acceptance, and gentleness. A good man is not always nice, and being nice isn’t always good! Be a good man, not a nice man.

This world is coming to a crossroad where you will all be victims because of your complacency. My God! Men wake up, rise up, gird your loins and act like men of old. Throw away indecision and fear of rejection by your peers. Who gives a rip what others think of you! If God is telling you to “Get Up” then do it! I don’t know about you, but I don’t need any more friends. I can hear the whiners now. “Oh that’s so callous, don’t you think you’re taking this a little far?” So what, I don’t care what you think. And to the people that say they don’t like me. “Stand in line with the others that don’t like me and take a number!”

I am here to please only my God and to give protection, provision, and leadership to my family and kingdom. What is “my kingdom” you ask? Everywhere and anywhere I choose to go!

Do not even begin to tell me where my boundaries are!

Doug Burrell

Copyright @ 2012

www.hurtbylove.com


Matthew 5:44 has always rattled my cage. Let me tell you why. For 24 years I worked behind the walls of three different prisons in California. During this time I was surrounded by hundreds of inmates. Inmates that didn’t like me. Inmates that want to attack me or inmates that wanted just to wreck my day. To be fair, not all inmates were that way though. So it’s safe to assume that I was there enemy and they were mine. How was I supposed to love somebody that I was tackling or love somebody that was trying to stab me.

Well, it dawned on me that I was loving my enemies, but not in the way that the typical Christian, who follows a typical official church script believes. So if anybody is an expert at loving their enemies, I surely had become the expert.

Well as a prison guard, I learned to listen to the Holy Spirit and apply mentoring to inmates that I felt would receive the wisdom I had to offer. Sometimes this wisdom or guidance would come out within a day or two after being in a physical confrontation with the same individual. Many times after being in a fight with one of these guys we both learn to respect each other and from that a relationship will develop at least a relationship in as much that could be developed within the confines of understanding that he was the inmate and I was the guard.

From there a dialogue started, and if the Holy Spirit blessed it then the it was pretty easy to tell. If not, maybe somewhere down the road it would be blessed. Anyhow, it didn’t matter, it was God who initiates salvation and is responsible for the ears to be opened not me. I am just His servant.

Doug Burrell, The Creators Clay


First I have to give credit for this to David Murrow from Church for Men. http://churchformen.com/teaching-in-the-church/the-gospel-according-to-toyota/ He is an advocate for authentic masculinity in the church. Thanks David.

We’re in the thick of the NFL playoff season. If you’re planning to watch a game or two this weekend, do me a favor: pay close attention to the commercials. You’ll learn a lot about men.

Advertisers have learned there are certain words and images that motivate guys to commit. Here’s an ad from Toyota, promoting the Tundra Pickup Truck:

Let’s break it down: A rough, gravel-voiced announcer. A dangerous situation. Huge metal beams swinging through space. Dirt. The sound of a motor roaring, tires squealing, metal grinding and cables snapping. Crowds of men cheering the truck’s narrow victory. A final angular logo that slams into place.

Now let’s look at a commercial you’ll never see on an NFL broadcast. It’s from the same advertiser, Toyota. See if you can figure out which gender this ad is targeting:

Flowers. Children. Butterflies. A female singer. A message of harmony. A logo that gently folds out onto the screen.

In case you haven’t figured it out, the Prius is targeted at wealthy urban women who think of themselves as eco-friendly. The Tundra Pickup is targeted at men who think of themselves as rugged and hard-working.

Here’s the point: men and women respond to different imagery. Sure, there are always exceptions, but the genders as a whole are quite predictable. Advertisers know this. So they customize their sales pitches. Toyota would never use flowers and dancing children to sell a pickup truck because men would hate it. It goes against everything men believe about themselves.

Which leads us to the church. Without realizing it, many churches have created a Prius-like culture. We focus heavily on relationships. Healing. Nurturing. Harmony. We decorate with flowers, quilts, ribbons and lace. Our ministries revolve around domestic tasks such as cooking, childcare, and education.

And we’ve softened our message. We’ve cleaned up the grit, grime and danger. The gospel is no longer a hazardous mission – it’s a personal relationship. It’s about family harmony. Getting along with others. Being nice.

No wonder we’re having trouble motivating men to commit.

Fortunately, there’s a book that can help any church recapture the adventure of following Jesus. It’s called THE BIBLE. It’s pages are stained with blood. It’s very message is danger.  As one of my favorite pastors often said, “The Gospel, properly followed, will kill you.”

So as you watch football commercials this weekend, ask yourself: is my church putting a Prius spin on the gospel? Are we unwittingly targeting women with our message and ministries? If so, how can we recapture the dangerous message Christ proclaimed?


I want to share with all of you something, a God breathed passion I have had for a long time now. I know I may seem rough around the edges. But if you really knew me you would know how much I love people. Let me start by saying I was saved in 1993 and experienced a very powerful conversion.

God gave me dreams and visions almost daily, along with the gift of prophecy. I understood every word in the bible and on a very deep level. And I read the KJV!

I became so focused on the word that I worshiped it and it’s amazing power. I was amazed one day when God told me to stop reading. You see I read for 10-12 hours a day for over a year and a half. This was before I ever stepped foot in a church. After some time I slowed down to maybe just a couple hours. Just enough time to read 10 or 20 chapters. This is when God told me to stop reading.

Why did He tell me that? Well knowing His word isn’t enough! He wanted me to know people. My soul yearned to know people and help people. Many times it was just a hug or a short conversation. You see the whole bible is about restoration, its that simple. God sent His son to restore us to Him, and we complicate matters with theology and 10 step lessons to become closer to God. If you want to get closer to Him then embrace and love others. Start with your family, take time to listen just a Christ said “forbid not the children from coming to Him.” Allow everyone a voice and respect their opinions. It’s not important to be right. It’s important to love and support others.

I see people so busy that they don’t have time for each other. What good does being busy do? Activity does not equal achievement, but achievement is attained through peace and contentment that comes from doing His will. And His will is restoration! It’s that simple. Please don’t fall for the chatter you hear in church about doing something big for God. He has already done the big part. We need to just love each other by taking the time to hug, listen, and point. One person at a time…


Ok so I am still trying to figure out the difference between how a woman loves and how a man loves. Then I want to put this into perspective of how we love Jesus.

What does love Jesus mean? If the two genders express love differently, then we must accept this and not judge or attempt to fix the other gender. Then we must also consider. “I love you” – “I’m in love with you” –  “and “I’m loving you.”

As a man, when I say “I love you” to my wife, it means just that and nothing more. When my wife says it to me, there is this look of adoration towards me. Now when I say “I’m in love with you” to her, then my heart is becoming involved. Of course the “I’m loving you” is the act of making love towards each other, which includes all three of the statements above.

Lets take it a step further and get into the mind of the genders during the profession of love towards each other. When I say “I love you” I am expressing and declaring my care, provision and protection over my wife. When my wife says it to me, she is saying she adores me and her heart beats for me and she wants to give me all that she is. On the surface it sounds like I don’t know much about what love is. But nothing can be further from the truth. However, the world through the media has defined love from mainly a female perspective. No wonder so many guys are confused today. And so many women are eagerly waiting for the heart strings to be tugged.

Now of course both genders express love with the heart and with action, but I believe a man express’s love with action first and primarily and then emotion. Conversely a woman must express love with her heart primarily and then action. That is the main difference between the two genders.

We must acknowledge the fact that men express love differently. When Jesus asked Peter “do you love me” 3 times to the point of Peter’s frustration. Jesus finally answered and told Peter “feed my sheep.” This is an action that declares care, provision, and protection over the sheep. Jesus was saying to Peter if really love me then prove it with you actions. He didn’t say “put your heart into it mister!” At least at this point. I’m not saying that men shouldn’t involve their heart either.

I want to also point out that when Jesus chose the disciples, he told them to follow me. For me to follow someone it takes a great deal of faith, courage, and belief on my part. I also wonder why He called men instead of women. This was a time for work and a call to battle as well. This was not a time for adoration. I wonder if he chose only men because now was not the time for love but action and war. A war to save mankind. Just my thoughts…

Note – do a search on Google for “love” in the image section and you will find hearts, flowers, and kissing couples. But never, care, provision and protection.

Well part two is going to cover – 

  • What was church like during Christ’s time?
  • What was church like during the reformation?
  • What was it like 100 years ago?
  • What was it like 50 years ago?
  • And now?
feel free to comment, this topic is worthy of help and discussion
thanks
Prophetshrek

This is good stuff, to bad todays culture in America has lost this. It would be awesome if Christian men could grab hold of this and run!

The Knights Code of Chivalry and the vows of Knighthood

The Knights Code of Chivalry described in the Song of Roland and an excellent representation of the Knights Codes of Chivalry are as follows:

  • To fear God and maintain His Church
  • To serve the liege lord in valour and faith
  • To protect the weak and defenceless
  • To give succour to widows and orphans
  • To refrain from the wanton giving of offence
  • To live by honour and for glory
  • To despise pecuniary reward
  • To fight for the welfare of all
  • To obey those placed in authority
  • To guard the honour of fellow knights
  • To eschew unfairness, meanness and deceit
  • To keep faith
  • At all times to speak the truth
  • To persevere to the end in any enterprise begun
  • To respect the honour of women
  • Never to refuse a challenge from an equal
  • Never to turn the back upon a foe

Of the seventeen entries in the Knights Codes of Chivalry, according to the Song of Roland, at least 12 relate to acts of chivalry as opposed to combat.

via Knights Code of Chivalry.